Dilemmas and To-Do Lists

DH is gone tonight, attending SIL The Mentor's graduation from seminary. I was supposed to go too. I really wanted to be there. Only, the babysitter never returned my phone call and even if she had, I'm too sick to go anyway.

I was also too sick to stay home and take care of three kids and cook dinner very well, but when DH offered to stay home, I said I thought I could manage.

We did get through the evening with everyone intact--at least bodily.

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It didn't help that, since I've been feeling pretty rotten for several days now, a lot of things have been left undone. The girls and I did a lot of tripping over things, looking for things, rescuing things that had reached a state of urgency, and having to clear space before we could do things. Every noise seemed loud, every annoyance seemed huge and every effort felt like the end of a marathon tonight. Of course, AF chose just the opportune moment to make her appearance as well, adding to my comfort and joy.

The kids and I did get the garden watered (the kids also watered each other, despite my instructions to avoid getting wet, and then apparently rolled in the garden, and then traipsed through the house trailing mud). We also cleaned out the hamster cage and fed the frog and the hamster.

DH has been able to help with childcare, rototilling and some other things this week, but when it came time to cook dinner I looked around and wanted to cry.

The food I'd cooked ahead for such an occasion was all gone (at least DH didn't have to cook anything). I had thought there was some soup left, but the container in the refrigerator turned out to contain nothing but a few chicken bones. The small bowl of chicken soup DH and the kids had brought me this afternoon must have been the last of it. (It probably didn't help my mood much tonight that the soup and a few cookies were all I'd eaten today.)

There wasn't a single thing already-prepared or quick-to-prepare that Baby E and I could eat for dinner.

There was the package of lamb ribs I'd thawed a few days ago, so I stuck them in the oven to roast. I didn't know what to put on them, so I just salted them and put a lid on the dish. I threw together a homemade barbecue sauce out of tomatoes, onions, garlic, chopped herbs, sea salt, a dash of pepper, some honey and the juice from half a lemon to serve with them.

But by well after dinner time the ribs were still half-raw, even though they'd already cooked far longer than they should supposedly take to be done. I separated the ribs into two dishes and spooned sauce over one half, but I wasn't at all sure how much longer they would need to cook.

So there I was, dinner already late, the kids whining, Baby E clinging to my ankles fussing and crying alternately for "milk" and "hold you!". I racked my brain trying to figure out what we could eat. We were out of hamburger. Every kind of meat I had in the house was frozen and raw.

There was not a single clean surface in the kitchen, not to mention a large enough clear space on which to prepare anything, and very few clean dishes. I ended up pulling out the breadboard and working on that, but despite my warnings the kids kept walking around the corner and banging their heads into it (oh, yeah, that's why I never use the breadboard).

I fed the kids some raw carrots and watermelon, and gave the older two each half a PB&J sandwich I'd found in the refrigerator (left over from lunch, apparently). But the meat still wasn't done, and everyone was still hungry.

I finally sent the kids to get ready for bed while I peeled and sliced carrots and onions, cut more herbs from the garden, and started the carrots and onions sauteing with a little fresh basil.

By the time the kids came down in their pajamas claiming their chores were done (not true, as I later found out), the lamb was done and I could serve dinner.

The food turned out well. But oh, for the days when I could just open a can of something or call for takeout on days like this. The BBQ sauce was a big hit, and I was pleased with how well it turned out for inventing it completely from scratch. Too bad I didn't measure everything so I could write down the recipe.

Now the two older kids are finally in bed, after much whining, crying, and stalling, and too much yelling and a few tears on my part, too. They're not asleep, and I keep going in to shush them. Baby E is in fine form, getting into things left and right and going in to wake the older girls at every chance she gets.

All I really want is to take my achy, tired, itchy, coughing, grumpy, hormonal self to bed. But things around the house have reached a critical point after several days of neglect.

So, as soon as I finish nursing Baby E (who is, at the moment, playfully pinching my arm and kicking the computer desk, trying to hit the keyboard with her feet, and pulling on my sleeve to try to keep me from typing), I have a list of things that must get done tonight:

1. Washing all the bedding from my bed and remaking it. (It's been more than 3 days since every stitch of fabric on the bed was washed in Very Hot Water, meaning the dust mites in the bedding have gotten to the point where sleeping actually does me more harm than good--even though I've been sleeping without pillows for the last two nights because they were in the laundry)



2. Getting all the dirty laundry out of the bedroom and vacuuming the carpet. (See above--waking up with eyes nearly swollen shut and breathing raspy is not helpful when pollen allergies and illness are already taking their toll.)



3. Washing my hair to get rid of any allergens lurking there. I might also try to learn how to use the nasal rinse kit I bought months ago, but that entails boiling and cooling water, so it may not happen tonight.



4. After finishing the laundry from the bedroom, a load of diapers must get started. It's way overdue, we're out of clean diapers, and the pail stinks to high heaven.



5. But before I can do more laundry, I have to make a batch of laundry soap. Because we're out. And that involves somehow finding the bag of soap flakes I mislaid a few weeks ago, or grating a new bar of soap. I may end up just mixing the soap dry this time, but I really do prefer the liquid. It gets the laundry cleaner with a few drops of essential oils added.



6. Before I can make laundry soap, I have to clean up the kitchen so I have a place to work and dishes in which to measure and mix it.



7. While I'm cleaning the kitchen I need to make a big batch of tea, so it can cool in time to feed the kombucha before the SCOBY starves or molds.



8. I'll feed the sourdough starter, too. I should really use some of it to make a batch of muffins or some bread for tomorrow's breakfast, but we'll see if that happens or not.



9. I also need to clean out the potty chair, which has had the fruits of at least 3 or 4 potty sessions sitting in it for some time.



10. And, I need to clean up the bathroom floor where Baby E had an accident a day or two ago and it just got wiped up but not sanitized, and the kitchen floor where we spilled a bit when cleaning out the hamster cage earlier today.



11. But first, I have to somehow get Baby E to go to sleep. Right now she's in the crib screaming.



12. Now she's in my lap again. She was rattling the crib, which had a screw very loose. Two screws, actually. After finding the screwdriver and attempting to tighten them, it appears that either I'm just doing something wrong or they're stripped out. I did tighten the screws quite a bit, but they are still a bit loose and the frame seems wobbly. I'm not sure how safe the crib even is for her to be in, the way she shakes the sides when she wants out.



13. But in order to put her to bed somewhere besides the crib, I'd need to do some major cleaning and moving of storage bins in her room, and move the toddler bed in there. I can't put her in my bed, because there's currently no bedding on it.



14. Oh, yeah, I also need to clean up the mud the kids tracked all over the carpet and take care of their muddy clothes.

I think I'll be calling my doctor or allergist soon to ask about some Very Powerful Medication to make this all. go. away. Or to maybe at least minimize the allergy symptoms. The Zyrtec samples I've been taking don't seem to help much. Maybe I'll try some Benadryl tonight.

P.S. The big girls seem to be asleep, finally. Baby E is asleep in my arms. I think I'll try laying her in the playroom bed, at least temporarily.

I'm glad tomorrow is Saturday.

P.P.S. Baby E woke up when I tried to lay her down, and didn't go back to sleep even with me lying down with her. She was all perky after her nice little nap, and ready to have a second dinner and play.

After going up and down, around and around several times, I called DH around 10:30 in tears, asking when he would be home. He said he had no idea and had no control over what time they left, since he had ridden with other family members. Not too long after that, though, he called to say he was headed home.

Now it's nearly midnight and he has fixed Baby E's crib and is now attempting to get Baby E to sleep. I've gotten quite a few things on the to-do list done, DH is going to do a few more, and a few will have to wait for tomorrow.