If we could just have relationships without the people element complicating things . . .
Several people I know are going through really tough relational situations right now, and I really feel for them.
Life is such a messy, unpredictable thing--especially where people and relationships are involved. The more I experience it, the more I realize it's impossible to have real friendships or deep relationships without pain, conflict, and lots of hard work involved.
Sometimes we hurt people or they hurt us without even realizing it. Often it's just the little things, that we have to decide whether to talk about and try to work through or just let go. Is it a "confront one another in love/leave your gift at the altar and go talk to your brother" and "forgive seventy times seven" thing, a "love is not easily offended" thing, or a "take the plank out of your own eye" thing? Or maybe it's more than one of those. Sometimes it's hard to know.
Sometimes I wish I could just hibernate for a year or ten and not have to leave my home or interact with anyone. Or at least keep things "safely" at a somewhat superficial level. It's easy to think life would be less complicated that way. But in my heart I know the potential for richness and depth outweighs the potential for hurt.
I just wish it wasn't so hard.
Life is such a messy, unpredictable thing--especially where people and relationships are involved. The more I experience it, the more I realize it's impossible to have real friendships or deep relationships without pain, conflict, and lots of hard work involved.
Sometimes we hurt people or they hurt us without even realizing it. Often it's just the little things, that we have to decide whether to talk about and try to work through or just let go. Is it a "confront one another in love/leave your gift at the altar and go talk to your brother" and "forgive seventy times seven" thing, a "love is not easily offended" thing, or a "take the plank out of your own eye" thing? Or maybe it's more than one of those. Sometimes it's hard to know.
Sometimes I wish I could just hibernate for a year or ten and not have to leave my home or interact with anyone. Or at least keep things "safely" at a somewhat superficial level. It's easy to think life would be less complicated that way. But in my heart I know the potential for richness and depth outweighs the potential for hurt.
I just wish it wasn't so hard.
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Posted by purple_kangaroo at 11:50 PM[Permanent link]
6 Comments:
I'm sure there are many who could empathize with you. You bring up one of the truly remarkable dillema's in life. And...what makes such a conundrum of emotions, dreams and realities so difficult is that there truly are no answers. Only responses, .ost of which lay in an area of ambiguity and abstractness that make life as rich as it is.
Allow me to leave you with a thought that was implanted in my head long ago by a friend. I don't offer it to be glib. It is a thought that has helped me often to deal with some of the things you bring up; and not just about realationships. He said " Have a great day!...Unless you have something else planned!
Thanks for the thoughtful and forthright post. Good Luck to you.
I completely agree ...
Totally in agreement here. I will never understand why people knowingly hurt each other. And if they unknowingly do and are confronted with the knowledge that they did, I'll never understand why some people can't apologize and help mend fences. I am very forgiving, and I know so many aren't. I guess leaving the door open is the key, and you have to risk that some people won't step over the threshold to join you.
I know how you feel... ;-)
I know what you mean. I'm glad I'm not the only one who puzzles over other people's recalcitrance. I sometimes wonder what's wrong with me that I don't get why other people act the way I do. Sometimes I want to grab certain members of my family by their collar and give them a little shake and say: just move on! Get over it! Life is too short.
I will remember lhombre's friend's quote. That is terrific.
Thanks for your comments, everyone. It's fascinating to me how much a post like this brings out different responses in everyone . . . I guess it depends on where it happens to hit you in your own life.
lhombre, welcome to the blog. Your signature pic looks so much like one of my uncles that I did a double-take! I have been thinking about that quote a lot since you posted it--there may be a post forthcoming about it. :)
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