Play Therapy

AJ had her first play therapy session today. It was really interesting to watch. The therapist quietly sat with AJ while she played, observing and talking with her. She told AJ that she could tell her anything at all, and talk about anything she wished.

AJ spent quite a long time petting the therapist's cat. The therapist told AJ the story of how she'd gotten the cat, which had previously been mistreated, how the cat chose this new home, and how the cat learned to feel safe again.

It was quite interesting to watch . . . the therapist just let AJ play and explore however she wanted to with the various toys, dress-up supplies, art supplies and other things in the house.

With a bit of gentle prompting from the therapist, AJ kept up a running chatter while she played.

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There was a sand box on a stand, and AJ set up an elaborate ocean scene in it with toys. She told the therapist the names of all the different sea creatures. "This one is a horseshoe crab, and that one's a squid, and this one is a killer whale. This one I call a blow-up fish, but it's actually called a puffer fish."

"You know all their names!" the therapist said, and AJ said almost apologetically, "Not all of them . . . just some of them." Then she proceeded to tell her the names of a bunch more.

Some of the creatures she said were mommies and babies. She put two divers into the scene and said they were there to keep all the fish safe. When asked which character would be herself in the scene, she pointed to a statuette of the Little Mermaid and talked about how much she would like to dive and swim under the water.

The therapist, mostly just by giving AJ her full attention, listening well, inserting occasional well-placed questions, and reflecting back to AJ the things she said, had AJ talking about various things including herself, her family and friends, and some of her recent frustrations.

They talked, for instance, about how MM swings higher and runs faster than AJ does. "But now I'm getting used to it," AJ said. I had to smile, thinking of how this week her extreme and seemingly constant meltdowns about the subject abruptly ended.

They talked, as I often have with her, about how there are other things AJ does best, and how everyone has different things they're good at. The therapist reassured AJ that even if M&M sometimes is better at things than AJ, AJ will always be the oldest.

Partway through the session, AJ said, "This is a really comfortable room. I like it." Then she looked up at the therapist and said, "It's almost like you're my mom."

I thought it was neat that she compared the warm, comfortable setting and the soft-spoken, attentive therapist to being with her mommy. :)

Toward the end of the session AJ drew a picture of her house and a tree, with herself and M&M in the window. As she worked she talked about her family, her wish for a horse, and her thoughts about being the oldest child.

As we got in the car to drive home, AJ said decisively, "That lady is a doctor, all right."

"Really?" I asked, surprised. "You think she's like a doctor?"

"Yes. A doctor for happiness."

"I guess she is sort of like a doctor, in a way. That kind of doctor is called a counselor, or therapist. Spending time with her made you feel happy?"

"Yes. I can't wait until next week."

As we drove home, AJ told me that when she grew up she was going to bring her children to this doctor so she could make them happy, too.

"But," she said, "by the time my kids are old enough she might not be alive any more, because she's pretty old. She's already 64. I don't know if she'll still be around when I want to take my kids to see her."

Then she decided that when I was old--64, like the counselor--I should learn how to become that kind of doctor, too. I should move into my own house and get lots of neat toys and art supplies, and then I could help AJ's kids learn how to be happy.

Of course I said that sounded like fun, and that I would love to play with AJ's kids and help make them happy. AJ said that when she turned 64 she wanted to become a therapist too. Then she and I could both make everyone happy.

I thought it was really interesting that she would call the counselor a "doctor for happiness" and say that she made people happy, because that's not something we said to her. During one of her meltdowns, I did ask her if she would like to talk to someone about the things that were bothering her, and we had talked about how we might be able to find someone who would try to help her figure out how to feel better and how to help herself calm down when she was upset.

As far as I know, the "doctor for happiness" idea was just something she came up with on her own.