Friday, September 23, 2005

In defense of strollers



Ann Althouse is discussing this NYT article about strollers: "Supersize Strollers Ignite Sidewalk Drama."

The article and Ann both rant about today's strollers and how annoying and rude they are. They and several commenters complain about the needlessness and selfishness of using anything larger or more feature-filled than a basic cheap umbrella stroller. They conjecture about whether having a big stroller is a way to feel powerful and be pushy or gloat about having children. Some question the need for strollers at all.

I'm an admitted stroller junkie. (Yes, all the strollers above are or have been mine, and I can't find a photo of my beloved KidCo at the moment.) I've done a lot of research about strollers and have owned quite a few. DH laughs at me identifying the make and model of strollers I see at the mall or zoo. I like strollers. So this hit a nerve with me.

I posted a comment that turned into a soapbox rant, so I thought I'd better just make it into a post on my own blog.

First of all, let me say that I've been rammed by many more grocery store shopping carts than I ever have by strollers. I've seen more people be rude with shopping carts than with strollers, and a fully-loaded metal shopping cart is a dangerous weapon indeed.

I'm a parent of three children, ages 4, 3, and 7 weeks. When my second child was born, my first was a year old and had just barely started toddling.

Have you ever tried carrying an infant, a one-year-old, a diaper bag and several shopping bags in your arms? You should.

A double stroller was a necessity for me--especially since I had severe back and shoulder problems which precluded the use of a sling or front-pack carrier for any length of time.

I did a lot of research (the stroller message board on iVillage/parentsplace was an invaluable resource) and decided on a side-by-side. It was much lighter and more maneuverable than a front-and-back stroller, and it had the important safety features I wanted.

My double stroller, a KidCo Double Maverick Plus (similar to a MacLaren Twin) was 28" wide (the same width as a wheelchair and the smallest possible width for a double SBS) and turned on a dime.

Even so, there were a lot of places it wouldn't fit. I can't believe how narrow some stores make their aisles. It made me realize how handicapped-inaccessible many places are.

There were times when someone needed to get by and it was impossible to get out of their way or turn around. In a case where one person is able to easily move out of the way and the other isn't, it is necessary for the person who can get out of the way to do so. I always apologized, of course, but it's not reasonable to expect the one with the stroller to walk backwards the entire length of the store when the other person could simply step into a side aisle for a few seconds to let the stroller pass.

Our culture today is very different than it was in the past, when people grew most of their own food and rarely left home, or had relatives and neighbors to help with the shopping and/or care for the children. And may I point out that the old prams were much bulkier than today's strollers, for the most part?

The fact is that for many parents, it's either use a stroller or stay home unless they can limit themselves to 10-minute trips which don't require carrying anything of substance.

About the size issue:

I really don't think many people, if any at all, pick a stroller because it's big. In my experience, most parents want to get the smallest possible stroller that has all the features they consider necessary.

That article was totally wrong when it said that there's no difference (or no way for a parent to tell the difference) in safety between various stroller models. There are plenty of resources like consumer reports, customer reviews, and discussion boards where parents can research and compare various strollers. Of course, they'll want to try out and compare several in the store as well.

Some companies and types of strollers have many more recalls than others. Some styles are obviously safer than others--for example, a stroller with a bar or a 5-point harness is much safer and harder for the child to get out of than an umbrella stroller that lets them lean forward and catch their fingers in the wheels or slide out of the belt onto the ground.

A lightweight umbrella stroller will tip over backwards very easily if you put a moderate amount of weight on the handles. Also, as someone else mentioned, an umbrella stroller with no recline cannot be used at all for infants too young to sit up. And a stroller with tiny wheels that gets stuck at every crack in the sidewalk and is almost impossible to roll on rough surfaces isn't very useful to most suburbanites.

There are all kinds of features parents look for and consider when purchasing a stroller.

The harness type and level of recline is important, as is whether the straps can be made long or short enough to fit a given child. A narrow or short stroller may not fit a large baby, while another stroller may be too roomy to comfortably and safely accommodate a small infant. There are huge variations in weight, wheel size and type, maneuverability and ease of folding and unfolding of various strollers.

Something seeminly simple like the amount and type of padding, width and height of a stroller, toy bar/tray or lack of one, and level of recline may make the difference between a child enjoying the ride or wiggling and screaming every time they're put in the stroller.

Extras like snack trays, pretty fabrics and cupholders are important to some; durable construction and good safety records/consumer reviews are more important to others.

Most people nowadays want a basket big enough to hold a diaper bag and some shopping, since hanging a lot of weight on the handle makes a stroller unstable.

Different strollers are rated for different weights and heights of children. Tall and short parents will want different strollers so that they can reach the handles or aren't kicking the wheels.

Having a stroller that fits into the trunk of your car is important, as is having one that you can lift and push without difficulty.

It's really nice if the stroller doesn't fall apart after a few dozen uses, and if it has a large enough canopy to protect your child from the elements. Some parents like to have a stroller that's compatible with their infant car seat/carrier. Others just want one that will fit through the door of their apartment complex.

The considerations in making a stroller decision are nearly endless. Since it's an item most parents use a lot for several months or years, it is an important decision.

Sure, everyone used to use simple umbrella strollers or prams. But they also used to let their kids sit on the floor of the car or hold them in their laps instead of using a child safety seat. Just because people used to make do with poor tools doesn't mean we shouldn't take advantage of better ones now that they're available.

Your thoughts?

10 Comments:

Blogger Running2Ks said...

I couldn't imagine lugging 2 or 3 (or more) kids around without one. Now, for the rare mom who buys a giant cadillac double stroller for one kid (and shopping bags), well...LOL!

No, it makes more practical sense than the alternatives. I was lucky enough to have a second child stay small enough to be in a Baby Bjorn while the older one likes to walk.

5:02 AM  
Blogger Liz Miller said...

We also have lots of strollers.

One Graco (that had the detachable infant car-seat/carrier) We gave the infant seat to my sister's sister-in-law and are selling the stroller this weekend. Muffin Man can make do with....

...One umbrella type that we keep in the car at all times.

One Sit-n-stroll car-seat/stroller that is airline approved. Used only when travelling or as a spare car seat when APL and AB are going to the zoo with us.

And one bike trailer that can be pushed like a stroller. Never been used as a stroller yet.

As you said, P_K, different strollers for different uses. The Graco that we're selling tomorrow was wonderful. We used it often, it has a capacious basket, reclines, has snack holders. We used it for over 3 years and it still looks like new. Our umbrella stroller, otoh, looks like crap and the bonnet is falling apart. But we're only going to use it for things like zoo outings.

8:07 AM  
Blogger Liz Miller said...

And is it just me or is this "debate" similar to that of whether it's appropriate to nurse in public. What is it that they want, for parents with children (and specifically, mothers) to never leave the house? For children to not only not be heard, but not seen either?

8:09 AM  
Blogger ccw said...

I couldn't raise children without a stroller. I always had a "big" stroller for mall and long trips and an umbrella one for short trips and vacation.

Because I am lazy, I will ask you about the double strollers. I know the back to back ones can hold a car seat for the infant, but can a side by side one?

Why do people get so worked up about stupid stuff like this? You are right, shopping carts are far worse. Plus, if you really want to write an article about sometihng worth bitching over - how about people who take up more than 1 space when they park their car?

8:38 AM  
Blogger purple_kangaroo said...

R2Ks, a lot of people like to use the Baby Bjorn with the infant when they have two small children. That is nice if you're doing something where it's not too much of an encumbrance to have a child strapped to you. I wish I'd been able to wear my first two babies more--I never did find a carrier that worked for me with my back/shoulder problems. With my third, I guess I've developed enough upper-body strength that I can carry her that way a little easier.

APL, I noticed that a lot of the quotes from the article weren't actually about people being rude with strollers. Some of the people quoted were upset about the way someone with a stroller looked at them, the fact that they didn't get out of their way without being asked, or just the fact that they're taking up space.

For instance, take the guy who said, "They're blocking off products you want to get to," he said. "I find this particularly annoying in Barnes & Noble and Walden Books."

Do you suppose he actually said, "Excuse me, I'd like to get to that book behind your stroller, please," or did he just glare at the poor parent and expect them to read his mind?

The non-stroller-pushers quoted in the article seemed to not only expect stroller-pushers to read their minds, but they assumed they could read the stroller-pusher's thoughts.

Many of the reactions seemed to be from people who didn't actually speak to each other in the stroller incidents. Quite a few of the comments had more to do with what the non-stroller-wielders assumed the stroller-pushers were thinking than what they actually did.

"These women have a child, and they're like, 'Look at me,' " said Ophira Eisenberg, 33, a stand-up comedian from the West Village who refers to oversize baby strollers as lawn mowers. "It's like this baby is more important than anything, and everyone should be bowing down because they created life."

Yeah, right. I'm sure that's what the stroller-person is thinking. Eisenberg just judged someone completely based on external appearances, and attributed thoughts and emotions to them that are probably far from the truth.

I liked this quote: "If you've got a problem," Mr. Ford said, "then you've got issues beyond my stroller."

It's one thing to be frustrated if people are rude or bump into you and are careless or unapologetic. But, like several people said, that's about being rude, not about the stroller. People do the same things just as much when they're walking or pushing shopping carts.

I don't know if it's just New York, but the people quoted in the article seem to have a sense of entitlement that they shouldn't have to be inconvenienced in the slightest by anyone or step aside for anyone, ever.

In their minds it seemed more like a battle over who was entitled to the sidewalk because of the choices they made in life than a simple matter of who would have an easier time getting out of the way.

If the stroller can't easily move, are they going to refuse to step aside when they easily could, just because they feel, like Ms. Anderson, that "My choices and what's important to me shouldn't be seen as any less important in the grand scheme of things"? I wonder if Anderson refuses to step aside for wheelchairs, too.

A person probably has issues with their own life choices when seeing someone with a child makes them feel inferior, or when they feel another person's choice of a stroller can't be attributed to anything other than "I'm a parent that can afford to spend $700 on this" from "parents who somehow have decided that they are superior to everyone else because they have kids."

I'm not sure if it's New York non-parents who have issues, or just that one NYT reporter who managed to find the few oddballs who resent anyone with kids taking up space in the world. But I certainly don't see those kinds of attitudes around here--from either side of the issue.

10:55 AM  
Blogger purple_kangaroo said...

Liz, I think you're right that it is akin in some way to the breastfeeding "debate".

CCW, as far as I know there are only a few side-by-side strollers that accommodate an infant carrier. And, of course, they are necessarily wider than other models and also happen to be the more expensive strollers that the article assumed parents choose solely as a status symbol and not because of any features they have that other strollers lack. :)

I think the most recent Combi Twin Savvy can take a car seat, and some people use one in the Aria twin even though it's not technically designed for it. The two I know of for sure that take an infant carrier are the Mountain Buggy Urban Double and the 2005 Valco Twin Runabout

11:05 AM  
Blogger purple_kangaroo said...

CCW, I checked and the new $300 Combi Twin Savvy EX can accommodate a car seat (only their own) on one side. It can take kids up to 45 lbs. in each side.

Until this year the $600 MBUD was the only SBS to accommodate an infant carrier. It can carry 120 lbs combined weight.

Your other option, the $550 Valco Runabout Twin is similar to the MBUD but a bit more plush, and you have to buy the car seat adaptor separately.

Both the last two can accommodate various brands of car seats; with the Combi you are confined to their seat.

Here's a discussion I found comparing the MBUD and the Valco Twin.

Let me know if you need more info!

11:42 AM  
Blogger Liz Miller said...

I'm guessing that the people who have a problem with strollers are the same people who get annoyed 'cause they're not allowed to park in the handicapped spaces.

Phooey on them.

That said, if I lived in NYC, I'd have made a different stroller choice than the Graco (too heavy for subway use, too wide for easy manuverability on city sidewalks.)

12:24 PM  
Blogger ccw said...

Thanks for the stroller info. That is certainly more than I would want to spend on a stroller. However, maybe I can find one somehere. I will look at the discussion boards.

Thank you!

5:58 AM  
Blogger purple_kangaroo said...

CCW, I've found $300 strollers second-hand in the $25 range quite a few times--but what I decided to do with a double stroller was to go with one that didn't take an infant seat.

You use the stroller for so much shorter a time than the infant carrier, so I went with what I'd want in a stroller over the whole year or three I'd be using it and did without being able to use the infant carrier in it.

It's really good for the baby to change position and be moved to something other than the carrier every now and then anyway.

5:21 PM  

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